Jack

Jack and I are going to church camp together this coming weekend. This is my first time to go to one of my own kid's camps and serve as a leader. I am excited to do this with him. Jack and I have had a good summer together. Lots of good conversation  Lots of laughter. Lots of getting to know him and who he is becoming. And I must say I like him. He is a pleasure to get to know. 

Jack is my shy guy. He smiles a lot and when surrounded by people you may not even notice him at all. But if you stop in that crowd and take a look at the young man with reddish, brownish hair, freckles, and pretty blue eyes you would see a young man with a willingness to help a stranger, listen well to whoever is in charge, and you may see a little mischievous grin if he is plotting to prank someone.

He is a thinker. There have been many times when Jack and I were talking and I would ask him a question and he would say, "I'm not sure I'll have to think about it." And I would wonder if that was just a blanket answer but then a day or sometimes it's even been a week later he has come back to me and said, "Mom remember when you asked... well I have thought about it and here is what I think..." 

Jack is a ham. This is something that only people who really know Jack will find out about him. He LOVES to laugh, and play jokes on people. He loves to hear, watch, and experience comedy on many levels. He gets the giggles and if he finds something he thinks is hilarious he will replay it or say it, over and over and over again, until his older brother says, "Ok Jack it was funny the first time, now it's just over." 

Jack is an awesome helper with younger kids, and they ADORE him. I have noticed several people calling Jack their "Best Friend" Jack never corrects them or ignores them. He will smile and shyly look down. He can be very humble. I love that about him. All the little cousin's in the family love Jack and include him in their nightly prayers. He will play with them for hours at family get together's and is usually exhausted by the end but you never hear him complain.

I love knowing my kids. It is an intentional act and I'm not always good at it, but when those connections happen it is sweet. Sweet indeed!

Tears and Laughter

It has been awhile since I have written. Maybe you are thinking I haven’t written because I haven’t had anything to laugh or cry about. This would not be true. I have laughed and cried a lot in the last month.

I laughed when my son Jack had this look of horror on his face when he realized there was a vegetable on his plate. I mean seriously the kid looked like the plate had suddenly grown three heads and was calling him names like “Veggie hater”.

I laughed when I ran in the rain with no umbrella squealing like a little sissy girl.

I laughed when my friend Marilyn told me about walking the halls of the hospital after having surgery only to find out she had forgotten to double gown, so she was mooning people! I laughed pretty hard at that one!!

I cried. I cried when my friend lost her 18 year old son suddenly to death. I cried a lot. I am still crying.

I laughed at the funeral when someone told a funny story about her son eating Hershey Bar’s when he was little and getting caught.

Tears, and laughter, sometimes go hand in hand.

Marilyn, my mommie mentor

Today my sweet friend Marilyn is having heart surgery. I will never forget meeting her. I was in a Mom's Group at our church. I was new to the church and the area, did not have any friends yet. In walks this tall older woman who seemed to command the room. Oh and when she prayed! She prayed with such confidence!

One day after having gone to Mom's group for several weeks I notice Marilyn seemed to be following me as I went to pick up the boys from the nursery. I have my hands full and she offers to help. Then we got to talking  and she sweetly smiled at me and said the oddest thing. She said, "I am going to pursue you." I didn't quite know what to say to that so I didn't say anything. When my hubby got home later that evening I said, "Guess what honey? I am being pursued!" He didn't laugh. I thought it was funny. When I told him who it was then he laughed.

Pursue me she did. Not in a weird stalker kind of way, but rather in a loving friend, motherly mentor kind of way. We would meet for lunch, or coffee and just talk. She would give advice about the raising of boys. I would listen. She would pray and I would be in awe. She loved me when I needed to be loved.

She is a strong woman. She lives in Florida now but every time she makes a trip this way we always carve out time for each other. This last time she said, "Denise I am ready to go. If I die during this surgery it will be okay." I did not say a word because I knew if I spoke I'd cry. Yesterday she said to me, "My theme for today is I Surrender All." I quickly said, That is not my theme for today Marilyn, I am not ready to surrender you!

As I write this my sweet mommie mentor is having her surgery on a heart that is full of Jesus. If you are the praying type, I sure would appreciate a prayer being put up for my friend.

Humility

Humble: I tried to find an actual definition of humble/humility but the wording was confusing. So what does it mean to be humble? Humility is the ability to know and understand that you are not God. You don't have all the answers, you don't even have some of the answers, you don't have the master plan, you don't get to be the judge. Humility is being easily bent. As compared to stiff necked "I do it myself" mentality. Humility is the understanding that you don't do anything by yourself.

I love horses. I grew up on a horse farm. When trying to lead a horse if they are stubborn they will plant their feet and raise their head and stiffen their neck. Which makes it impossible to lead them, they don't go anywhere, they just stand there. If they are not stubborn they will relax drop their head and be easily lead. Sometimes the reason a horse will not be easily lead is because they don't trust the leader, or they can be scared of where they leader is taking them.

I want to be easily lead by my Lord. I don't want to be stubborn and stiff necked. I want to trust my leader. I want to be more humble.

The opposite of humility is pride. I'm sad to say that I have more than enough pride. Ugh! It is so ugly! I hate it! When I really sit and evaluate my past and current sins it all boils down to pride. Thinking I know better than the God of Universe, how absolutely preposterous is that???

I'm not the only one who has fallen into that trap. We see it in every character in the Bible (except Jesus who was perfectly humble), Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Peter, James, John, heck the whole nation of Israel! But here is the interesting thing. God blesses the humble.

In 2 Chronicles 12:6&7 "So the leaders of Israel, and the king humbled themselves, and they said, "The Lord is righteous." Now when the Lord saw that they humbled themselves the word of the Lord came to Shemaiah saying, "They have humbled themselves therefore I will not destroy them, but I will grant them some deliverance. My wrath will not be poured out on them."

Humility, what does it look like in your life? Are you like me and have a hard time giving up control? Are you like the stiff necked horse who plants their feet and doesn't trust the leader? Or are you easily bent, relaxed and pliable?

To Do List

To Do List:

• Make appointment for Jack to go see new orthodontist.
• Call dad
• Take the dog to get his nails trimmed
• Make dish to take to church graduation

These are only four items on my to do list for this week. There are at least 20 things that are not listed. None of them are bad things. All of them in fact are good things…if I don’t get the dogs nails trimmed soon he is going to be featured on one of those horrible Sara Mclachlan commercials with the singing “In the arms of the angels…”  yea you know the one! I digress. Which is what usually happens when I have a zillion things on my mind. I end up digressing all the time and never finishing anything!

I need my quiet time. Time to sit at Jesus’ feet and not think about that stinkin, never-ending to do list.  God knew what he was talking about when he commanded people to rest in Him. He knew what he was talking about when he said, “Be still and know that I am God.”

He knew it. I know it. And yet, how often do I obey? Is it easier to check off a list than it is to rest in Him? I had a friend say to me once when I questioned her about resting in God. She asked, “How do you do that?” She was genuine. How many of us are?

Do we even know how to rest in Him? God has not moved. He is not a God who is far away from His people. But we get so distracted with life and everything we think we have to do that we block Him out. How often is there silence in your home? The Holy Spirit is a gentleman. Most of the time He whispers. Are we too loud, too busy, to hear Him?

The Oldest and Boldest

The Oldest and Boldest

My oldest son Kendall has always also been my boldest.  When he was two years old as we were standing in line at the grocery store he told the lady in back of us, “Jesus got owie’s in his hands and his feet for all the people.” The lady smiled and Kendall just kept right on witnessing to this woman the whole time we were in line! And it wasn’t the only time!

When he was little we lived on a dead end street in the country. I would pack him and his brother in the double stroller and some of the neighbors and I would walk up and down the street for fellowship and exercise. Kendall was probably 3 and we were on our strolls. One of the neighbors kids was about 16 and he was little rough around the edges. On this particular day it was hot, and this fella’s face was really red. As we walked past his house Kendall said, “Hey, Hey you!” The kid came over and Kendall asked in a very serious voice, “Are you da debil?” translation: Are you the devil? His parents were standing near by and starting laughing and they responded, “Sometimes we think he is too, Kendall!”

Oh boy! Thank the Lord they laughed!

I am not bold by nature. I hate conflict and avoid it like the plague. I wish I had a little of Kendall’s boldness sometimes. 

What quality in your kids do you admire?

Embarrassing Moment

Embarrassing moments, we all have em. And if you don’t then your just lying. Some embarrassing moments can actually and usually turn into some of the funniest. It usually takes awhile before we find them funny but eventually if we are not too proud we will admit that it was pretty darn funny.

Okay when I was 17 I worked as a waitress in a very small town at a truck stop. There were only about 4 other waitress’s that worked my shift. There was Patsy an older lady that chewed gum and reminded me a lot of Flo from the sitcom Alice. Then there was Martha who was kind of a biker chick who took no prisoners, I was always a little afraid of her. Then there was Nan who took waitresing way to seriously if you ask me. Then there was my boss. My boss’s name was Norma. Norma was a very neat lady. Everyone in the town loved her. She died rather unexpectantly. We were all shocked and sad.

I of course wanted to attend the memorial service for Norma. Our town only had one funeral home so I heard the day that the funeral was going to be and got all dressed up and decided to go. I was very nervous. Norma’s death was very tragic. Her husband had shot her and so going into the service my mind was racing with thoughts like, “I wonder if the husband’s family will be here, I wonder if there will be fighting.” I just kept thinking okay I’ll just go in, do my duty and leave.

So I walk in and see Martha. I think oh good a familiar face! I made bee line for Martha. She looks up and says, “I am so glad you are here, I can’t believe you came.”

I said, “Yea I thought I should.”

She said, “Well my husband will be so glad.”

I thought, “hmm wonder why her husband will be glad, maybe he is related to Norma, it’s such a small town, everyone seems to be related to everyone.”

Martha then proceeds to take my arm and says, “Let me take you up to the casket.”

I am mortified. I have never been one who likes to go up to caskets, but what can I do? Martha the biker chick has my arm in a vice gripe. I am looking everywhere but at the casket on the way up to the casket and when we finally stop right in from of it I take a look and out of my mouth in slow motion I hear myself say

“That’s not Norma.”

Martha says, “of course its not, that is my father-in-law. You didn’t come here for him?”

“Ummm well yes of course I did, I’m so sorry for your father-in-law” And then walked briskly out the door only to find a sign that had an arrow with Norma’s name pointed to another room.  I did not go in.

I know it’s warped, and all but it’s one of those moments that can make me laugh no matter how bad my day is going, maybe if you’re warped too it gave you a chuckle.